Dave Meltzer Doesn’t Know Monty Burns

dave meltzer

Bret Hart and respected wrestling journalist Dave Meltzer have had a good relationship for a long time. Bret put Meltzer over in a big way in his book. Whenever Bret had a story, he’d go to Meltzer. It was mutually beneficial, for sure.

Point is: they were close.

Which is why the video below is so hilarious. In it, Meltzer is asked if Bret Hart ever sold back the mansion he bought from Monty Burns. For those who may not know, Monty Burns is the evil billionaire in “The Simpsons.” In a season 8 episode, Monty’s going broke, and has to sell everything he owns, including his mansion. The Hitman comes along and buys it.

I guess Meltzer never saw “The Simpsons,” because when he’s asked that question, Meltzer gives a detailed response about Bret’s real estate history, which I can only assume he knows, due to their longstanding professional relationship.

NOTE: The other voice in the video belongs to Bryan Alvarez.

ALVAREZ: This person here says, back in the 90’s, Bret Hart bought a mansion in America from Monty Burns – did he ever sell it back to him?

MELTZER: I thought his mansion was in Calgary. 

ALVAREZ: I never heard that story, so I thought I would ask you. 

MELTZER: Uh, um, I know that Bret had a giant – I don’t think – I don’t remember him ever living in the United States, you know, until, uh – I know he’s got the place in Hawaii now, but that’s after he retired. But I don’t remember him ever living outside of Calgary. Um, he had a – he built a huge house in Calgary. Um, I think this was in the late eighties even, maybe early 90’s. It was before he was like a big star, because I can remember when he – cause Bret Hart was always pretty frugal when it came to money. His nickname was ‘The Frugal Canadian,’ so he was pretty frugal when it came to money, which is a good trait. And then he bought the big house, and people we’re going, ‘God, he’s gonna have to wrestle until he’s, you know, fifty, to pay off that big house.’ And, um, as it turned out, he ended up making a lot more money than anyone ever imagined he would make in wrestling, but, um- Yeah, I-I don’t know, unless maybe he bought a house and then sold it, but he never lived in it. But I never remember him living anywhere but Calgary during his active career. 

If you listen to it, towards the end, Meltzer starts to sound genuinely baffled.

If only he knew who Monty Burns is. The dude did block out the sun, after all, and get shot by a baby.


Barry Ford